What's my Motivation....what makes me work so hard and what keeps me going?

I also thought of an answer - or several - to the above question after answering those other questions below.

What motivates me to work so hard?

The empty refrigerator on Thanksgiving Day.
The utility guy leaving the yellow sticker on my front door.
The people who teased me when I was a kid.
People who resent the fact I won't play the games they play.
The people in my life who told me I should be a secretary and not an artist.
Those who brush me off and act like I don't exist.
The fact I want to leave a piece of me behind, to prove to future generations I was here...I did exist.
The people who act as if what I do is "easy" and claim how they can do the same thing with half the effort.
People who act as if I'll never amount to anything or who imply I'll never accomplish anything.
People who infer because my materials are relatively inexpensive, my art and jewels should be priced like something on a Wal-mart shelf.
People who indicate my time is not valuable.
People who try to yank me down as soon as I start to excel.

Those are some of the personal things in my consciousness which motivate me to work hard...to prove to all those people in my life that I am worthy, I do have talent, and I can bring beauty into this world in my own way.

It's also me proving to the world that a person CAN do what they love and can pay the bills. For years I worked in something I hated (yes, I did what I was told and became the secretary while I secretly dreamed of working in something more artistic), and it feels good to show those people - "hey look...I am doing what I want now (after a 20 year delay!) and guess what? I'm earning money!" Sure, it's tough to pay all the bills on time sometimes - but like I mentioned, the empty fridge and the utility folks knocking at the door motivate me to work harder, to try harder, to reach out to more audiences, etc.

Notice in my motivation list...it all centers around "people". The humans in my world. Which is why I paint mostly animals, nature, scenery, birds in my work. To me, those things bring peace into a world where I've constantly been subjected to the above "messages" directed at me from people.

Most of the non-supportive and negative people are now gone from my life. I've learned to get away from anyone directing those messages at me relatively quick now. I know when I do that, some people wonder why I've just disappeared from their life. But there's really no point in explaining it - I've tried that and they don't get it or they deny it. The fact is, no matter what THEIR intention, that is how *I* felt and I had to make a decision to leave the situation for my own good. And I've never regretted it. Every time I step away from negativity, things improve for me. So I'll continue to do it....step away when it comes.

Some little known facts:

My first artistic piece was featured on Romper Room when I was 5 years old.
My first illustrated book was published by my school (Barrett's Elementary in Missouri) when I was 10 years old. The book name was "The Mischievous Raccoon".
My short story "The Champion She Dreamed Of" (about a horse) was accepted and published in my junior high school annual book of stories, poems and art when I was 14.
I worked at a restaurant as a waitress my first year in college and earned enough money just in tips in under 2 months to buy my first car myself.
I obtained a degree in Office Management from Freed-Hardeman University in 1986.
I worked as an accountant, office manager, and marketing director for over 15 years.
I have written and published articles, short stories, greeting cards, and a trade paperback novel, as well as several non-fiction instructional ebooks.
I have been fascinated with cubic zirconia since I was 13.
I've been making jewelry since I was 14.
Oprah owns a piece of my jewelry, and two of my bracelets were presented to the Mrs. Universe winners a few years ago.
I have extensively studied metaphysics, herbs, and alternative healing, and have published two ebooks in the field - "Healing With Color" and "The A Good Life Course".

Jai